Tight As Can Be Teen Squirts
When a girl asked me what I was doing in Denmark, I would say, “I bought a farm in Jutland. It’s always been my dream to be a farmer.” Some girls would give me a stone face, as if saying, “Look, asshole, just cut the shit and tell me what the fuck you’re doing here.” In that case, if you still want to talk to her, you’ll have to be more “boring” with your conversation by giving direct answers. The younger girls usually get taken in by humorous responses, which you can milk for a while before revealing the truth.
Opening girls should be easy for you, because your opener will be “normal” and not some of the lame shit Danish guys say or do. They approach toward the end of the night with stupid drunk game, increasing female bitch shields as the night goes on (this is a reason why I advise going early).
One time I saw a Danish guy open a girl by getting on his hands and knees and crawling between her legs. He went through, stood up, and tried to dance with her, but the frightened girl quickly rebuffed him. I almost dropped the drink out of my hand from pure shock. That’s the level of game you’ll have to beat in Denmark.
Starting conversations will be pretty easy because of your exotic status. Color me surprised at how interested girls were to know that I was from America (apparently not a lot of Americans visit Denmark). The fact that we’re in Denmark, when most Americans don’t even know that Denmark is a country, helps set us apart from our countrymen.
What didn’t help was that I’d usually get cockblocked during the rare times when things were going well, almost with the same frequency as in America. Danish girls have such a hardcore feeling of loyalty towards each other that they’re reluctant to ditch their girlfriends for a chance to get laid. More than anywhere else I’ve visited, it seemed like maintaining group cohesion throughout the night was important, whereas in America most nights end with some type of drama of who left who and whether Stacy is so drunk again she’s going to be a slut and fuck some guy without a condom. Even Danish guys had this group cohesion, sacrificing their own dick for the sake of being a “good” friend. Morons.
Just like in America, I recommend you feel for the kiss on the same night you meet. If you’re at a bar during the weekend where alcohol is involved and you’re having a conversation that isn’t interrupted often, I don’t see any reason why you shouldn’t get a kiss from a girl under the two-hour mark. For an average Danish girl, two hours is a sweet spot for the length of time it takes to kiss her, assuming she likes you and you know what you’re doing.
The biggest problem in getting one-night stands is logistics. Since all girls ride their bicycles to the bar or club, it becomes a pain in the ass for them to ditch the bike, go home with someone, and then pick it up the next morning. For a guy, having to pick up his bicycle the morning after getting laid is no big deal, but girls are overly worried about their precious hipster bikes and deathly averse to taking an expensive cab (medium-length rides are more than $20 US). One thing you can do is suggest that both of you ride to your place, but if she lives far from you, she’ll be resistant. Only if she is really horny will she be willing to overcome bad bicycle logistics, which is already stacked on top of the group loyalty problem I just mentioned.
The best logistical solution to the bicycle problem is to live within walking distance of where her bike is parked. When it’s time to go for the afterparty move by inviting her over for a drink, you’ll state how you live only “five minutes walking distance” away. The hamster in her brain likes this because she knows that regardless of what happens in your place, she won’t be far from her bike.
Therefore when it comes time to game at night, go to spots that are near your place, even if it’s not as good as a more distant spot. More than half of the battle in banging a Danish girl from night game is logistics, so get that settled from the start. When she asks where you’re staying early in a conversation, you better believe she’ll note your “down the street” answer in her head.
My hypocrite hater routine was meant to trap a girl who was trying to call me out for generalizing about Denmark. Early in a conversation, I’d make one of my observations about the country with a barely perceptible tone of annoyance. I’d say, “I’ve noticed that everyone in Denmark likes to wear earthy colors, like doo-doo brown and dark green. Also, the girls here are big fans of dirty military boots.” The girl would get annoyed at that statement because I used the word “everyone.” There is nothing a Danish girl hates more than when you generalize or stereotype, especially her own gender.
After she told me I needed to open my eyes to the awesomely unique and androgynous Danish style, I would offer a pseudo-apology: “I guess you’re right. I shouldn’t be so quick to judge.”
#boxershorts #morning #inbed #masturbating #Iwanttosuckhiscock